Aug 3rd PM

I know I shouldn't feel this way, but I am so incredibly frustrated.  I am so tired of looking at my pathetic excuse I call my body.  I have gained so much weight since Otto went into the hospital.  I am the heaviest I have ever been.  It's like I have hit rock bottom.  I feel absolutely disgusting.  I feel like I am not attractive in the least.  

I also understand that this weight is not going to go away overnight.  I know I have to make major changes and stick with them.  

I am proud of myself in the sense that I ate very well today.  I started the day with an omelet with some goat cheese and asparagus.  I had a handful of the nut, dried apple/cranberry mix.  For lunch, I had a chocolate shake with frozen berries.  I also had some cucumbers.  For dinner, I ate the garlic shrimp with the cilantro lemon spaghetti squash.  Instead of ice cream, I had some rice cakes with nut butter.

For exercise today, I did Week 4 Day 1 of Couch to 5K.  I also walked for an hour (almost 3 miles) during Lu's baseball practice.  I am super proud of myself for this.

Tomorrow is a new day, and I pray that God can help me shift my mindset.  I just want to start feeling better about my appearance.